As the year came to an end, I found myself wanting to write something profound. Drop my gems and pearls of wisdom I have had the great fortune of acquiring during the course of this year, to you, unsuspecting individuals who did not ask for them.
I kept thinking I should write about being 30 and the infinite wisdom that comes with being 30. I kept drawing blanks which means people who are 30 have zero wisdom to share unlike popular belief or I have not been 30 long enough to share shreds of wisdom. I am leaning towards the latter. So I will put a pin in it, until I have lived a full year of 30 to give my unsolicited opinions.
However if you were to ask me how I am feeling, well that is a different story.
I just finished reading Michelle Obama’s Becoming and she talks about a swerve. As I understood it: A shift. One that happens in two ways: choosing to do something that best suites you going against the image you have built up, convinved yourself to be or choosing someone or something that defies who you are and takes you out of your comfort zone and finding your voice and owning it within the discomfort.
A swerve is all that I have been feeling since I hit 30. I can not point to any physical swerve but it is instinctual. It is giddy and optimistic. It is also super protective of this state of being. It would be easy to chalk it up to end of year optimism for a new year, a fresh start but I have carried this for three months! I am chalking this one up to an instinctual shift.
A profound shift of:
Acceptance of who I am;
Appreciation of people who have walked into my life with the truest of intentions;
Letting go of people who bring zero significance to ones life;
A realization to smile more, laugh more and dance more and that my goofy and giddy side just wants to bust out and live
To do more and be more
I don’t know how all this will manifest into physical, tangible forms of a swerve but I look forward to it and enjoying every single moment.
I do hope that in 2020, you take a swerve that may be “uncharacteristic” which may end up to be very characteristic of You!
‘Musing of that Malawian girl’